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We lost a Warrior……

Forums General Melanoma Community We lost a Warrior……

  • Post
    snow white
    Participant

      It is with a very heavy heart that I have to relay this news.  Our dear friend and warrior Paul passed away on Friday 2/17/17.  I have been in touch with his daughter and she asked me to relay this news.  I am so very sad about this.  He gave me and my family so much hope, he was fighting so hard just to get back to LA to start the trial.  I had been keeping in touch with him via text after I met him in person at The Angeles Clinic. Such a great guy and will surely be missed, especially him humor!  His daughter has asked me to let all know that his services will be on Saturday at Pine Lake covenant church in Sammamish.  If you need more details I am happy to text her.  I know his family was a great support to him and will miss him dearly.  I will miss his posts on here so much.

      xo Jen

    Viewing 28 reply threads
    • Replies
        debwray
        Participant

          Dear Jen,

          Thank you for keeping us all informed. He will be missed not least because of his humour, encouragement and breadth of knowledge. Best wishes and condolences to all his family .. I loved his attitude …through all the adversity.

          So very sorry,

          Deb  x

           

          jennunicorn
          Participant
            NED

            This was hard to read. His wonderful and witty spirit will be greatly missed around here. 

            keepthefaith11
            Participant
              So sad, so sad…What an amazing and inspiring human being Paul was. He touched us all. His last post was Wednesday morning. I know he was having trouble but things sounded stable. He was talking about being moved to the floor. Such an unpredictable, vicious disease.

              Rest in peace, dear Paul.

              Annie

              ed williams
              Participant

                Paul once posted about his " Expiration date" 9/9/2015, for those of you that are new hear a lot can be learned from reading his posts from the past. My favorite is this one https://www.melanoma.org/find-support/patient-community/mpip-melanoma-patients-information-page/expiration-date#comment-84722  I am so glad that you made it so far Paul 2/17/2017 , you will be greatly missed my friend!!!Ed

                  maperny
                  Participant

                    This was such an awesome post, Ed.  Thanks for reposting it.

                    Maria

                    snow white
                    Participant

                      Thanks for posting this.  He had such a sense of humor and was so witty!

                    Cindyco
                    Participant

                      It's tough to put in words how much Paul meant to me, even though I've never met him.  He was such a gift to this forum.

                      jbronicki
                      Participant
                        Oh my goodness, I don’t have words. He was the best. He exemplified hope. He made me smile despite the seriousness of what many of you and us significant others are facing.
                        maperny
                        Participant

                          Thanks for passing on the news.  I am so deeply saddened by this.  What an optimistic, encouraging, warm, kind and strong person Paul was.  The tone and words of his posts lifted up so many including me.  

                          If these messages are pssed on to the family, may they know how much he helped so many on this forum.

                          Rest in Peace sweet Paul

                          Maria

                          cancersnewnormal
                          Participant

                            Oh maaaaaaaaan… Thank you for passing along the sad news. This is a huge bummer. He was swinging right up until it was time to go. His fight and humor will certainly be missed. : ( 

                            snow white
                            Participant

                              This news has left me feeling so heartbroken for him and his family.  My tears just keep coming, I guess because I know how heartbroken his family must be and becasue I know how badly he wanted to live and be with his love.

                                vivian
                                Participant

                                  This is such sad news.  Paul was a tremendous support to all of us here – old timers and newbees.  Hopefully his family can feel the love and light coming from his MRF friends.

                                  Lear

                                momof4boys
                                Participant
                                  I cant believe it and yet I had this feeling if he didn’t get to that trial quick this was going to happen. So sad. I’ve been reading his posts for several years! This sucks!
                                  Linny
                                  Participant

                                    This just sucks. Period. I will miss his posts and his wonderfully upbeat attitude.

                                    Peace be with you Paul. Now you can rest. 

                                    mdoh
                                    Participant

                                      Condolences to Paul's family and friends. We was such an inspiration. So sad.

                                      Bubbles
                                      Participant

                                        I am so sick of this shit.  I am so sick of amazing folks going to Hamid….to MD Anderson….begging…asking…What can you do for me?  I will do anything.  Sign anything.  And they are told…."Awwe man. You're awesome.  You're great.  I want to be F*CKing aggressive!!!"  And then….NOTHING!!!!!!!  "Oh, wait."  "I want you to be super healthy before you start this lame ass trial!  I want you to be at your best."  WTF???????????  Nobody scraping the bottom of the melanoma barrel for trial options is ever going to be better than they are at the minute they are asking for your help, melanoma mastermind!   This is the best they've got.  It will most certainly be down hill from here.  DO NOT feed them a load of shit.  DO NOT tell them that when they get this lab, that test, this one more thing – all really positioned just to make YOUR trial look good….THEN….and only THEN….will you let them sign on.  I hate melanoma.  But, I hate the jerks who promise big and deliver nothing even more! 

                                        Sorry guys.  Perhaps on another day I will be more encouraging.  On the other hand….there may be nothing I can say that is more encouraging…self worthy…..Paul and Artie…and ever so many others….worthy…than this.  STOP.  STOP yanking these good and honorable souls around.  Tell them the truth.  Either you WILL put them in your trial/treatment plan…TODAY.  Or not.  DO NOT KEEP doing THIS!

                                        Dear Pilau and the daughters and the others who loved sweet, funny Paulster.  I am sorry for your loss.  I loved him too.  celeste

                                          casagrayson
                                          Participant

                                            Celeste said this so well.  It is just incomprehensible to me that patients cannot get access to something that *might* save their lives.  It's like not giving morphine to a terminal patient because they might get addicted.  WTH?  Your anger is justified, Celeste.

                                            And Paul … dear Paul.  He was such a strong fighter.  He will be missed.  broken heart

                                            jennunicorn
                                            Participant
                                              NED

                                              Agree with every word of this. 

                                              Patrisa
                                              Participant

                                                So on point Celeste! Can we do anything? Write them a letter? Go to the media? Anything to expose them and maybe, just maybe make a difference?

                                                 

                                                snow white
                                                Participant

                                                  Gosh, your post is so on point.  I kept wondering why they didn't start the trial the first week that he was there.  I am still learning all of this.  I am so glad you speak your voice, especially for us new comers, you teach all of us a lot.  

                                                  xo Jen

                                                KMick
                                                Participant

                                                  I have to say that I agree with each and every post here; sadness and anger.  Thank you for posting although Paul's passing is not something any of us wanted to read.  

                                                  Patrisa
                                                  Participant

                                                    There are no words to describe my saddness over Pauls passing, I really loved him, he was the most amazing spirit i have ever 'met'…

                                                    Sincere condolances to his family, he will be greaty missed by so many of us…

                                                    Take care everybody…

                                                    Love,

                                                    Patrisa

                                                    adriana cooper
                                                    Participant
                                                      I went to go visit Paul today, but the only info I could find out was that he was discharged to home on Fri. I knew something wasn’t right.I wanted to stop in Thurs. Or Fri. But we had to limit our time at the hospital due to other obligations and Adriana’s strength. Damnit! This really hits home for me being from the same place. Adriana is not doing well right now as we are unable to get a handle on her pain and things seem to be getting worse inspite of our efforts. I have been aquainted with Paul for almost 3 years when he shared his story at the first MRF symposium that we attended here in Seattle. I enjoyed our visits. Also met his daughter here in the hospital. Jen please pass info to me so that I may attend on Sat. 2538845557. As I am posting this Paul’s pic with his story is displayed on this screen. Be at peace
                                                      Paul
                                                      Rob
                                                        maperny
                                                        Participant

                                                          Prayers for you and Adriana, too

                                                          Maria

                                                          snow white
                                                          Participant

                                                            Hi Rob, I have texted to get more info. 🙂

                                                          Anonymous
                                                          Inactive

                                                            My condolences to Paul's family and friends. Since being diagnosed Stage IV in June, 2016, I have frequently visited this forum for it's information and incredible inspiration from the many warriors who post. Paul showed honesty, integrity, and humour in the face of the melanoma beast.

                                                            JoshF
                                                            Participant

                                                              Thanks for posting. His daughter had text me Saturday and I'm so devastated that I'm at a loss. We were texting Wednesday night and he told me I was going to make it but his time was up….crushed me. We talked almost everyday, I miss him so much.

                                                                maperny
                                                                Participant

                                                                  Oh Josh, hang in there.  Paul was very wise, cherish his words, you will make it.

                                                                  snow white
                                                                  Participant

                                                                    I can on imagine the hurt and sorrow that you feel from this.  Wishing you peace as you continue to fight.  Remember what Paul said about your "expiration date" (Ed posted above).  I absolutey loved his post.  Stay strong Josh and keep the hope.

                                                                    xo Jen

                                                                  miaka618
                                                                  Participant
                                                                    This made me cry. I have never met the man, but like many others, have followed his story and hoped for the best. I hope he is at peace.
                                                                    jenny22
                                                                    Participant

                                                                      I signed on this morning to post some good news, but then saw Jens update on Paul.  I am heartbroken for him, and his family…..and angry that he wasnt able to start the trial.  (as per Celestes comments)

                                                                      We get close to so many on this board, but some are such a beacon of light and strength that touch us all.

                                                                      His sense of humor, optimsim and always positive attitude will be hugely missed. 

                                                                      I am so sad today….

                                                                      jenny

                                                                      Shaneswife
                                                                      Participant
                                                                        My deepest condolences to Paul’s family and friends. He was wise and funny. I will miss his posts.

                                                                        Janis

                                                                        Scooby123
                                                                        Participant

                                                                          Reading this sad news and all the lovely comments I cannot stop crying. I hate this disease . Paul and many others who have lost there battle my heart goes out too them and there families. We might not have the pleasure in meeting face to face all on this forum but I can hand on heart I do not know how I would cope without you guys. We all support and come together has one in helping us to fight this horrible disease. When we lose a member it's like losing one of your family. 

                                                                          My heart goes out to Paul's family he will be missed so much .

                                                                          Scooby❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

                                                                            snow white
                                                                            Participant

                                                                              I whole heartedly agree Scooby!

                                                                              xo Jen

                                                                            Casitas1
                                                                            Participant
                                                                              Damn it!!!
                                                                              Swanee
                                                                              Participant

                                                                                It is bittersweet but thank you Jen for this update on Paul.  

                                                                                It is so very hard to believe Paul's journey here has come to an end.  Paul made it all seem so easy with his humor and matter of fact way of telling us the details of his journey and keeping us all updated. Paul will be missed beyond words that can describe our loss here on MPIP, my heart aches for his family and the loss, they no doubt will feel  for a very long time.

                                                                                After spending the past 7 years here myself, the heartbreak here is palpable and I know why so many choose not to linger long if there is no reason to stay.  I know I've adjusted my own involvment as it can sometimes become detrimental to my own PMA (Al Dakota's abbreviation for Positive Mental Attitude) and journey with melanoma. Sometimes the grief and loss is so heartbreaking, you just can't take any more. 

                                                                                Everyone here is so very brave and fearless and God Bless all those that continue to help, support, fight alongside and heal others.  This is a tough journey and no one knows what their or their loved ones outcome will be when they start visiting, sharing and becoming involved with others from the MPIP family.

                                                                                I think Paul left us all a great gift in his passing and we should all honor Paul by paying it forward in our own melanoma journey, passing it on to others we love. Paul's  determination, optimisim, relentless fight against melanoma combined with his positive, humorous, witty and strong PMA, not only inspired us but will now heal us too!  Also, the fact that Paul never gave up and when one door shut, he was waiting for the next door to open.  Right to the end, Paul was looking at the next option on his list and waisted no time in setting the wheels in motion.  I'm comforted by knowing how busy Paul was right to the end, no idle moments thinking of his own mortality but always finding a way around obstacles  in those little slivers of hope that he found around each new corner he encountered.  What an amazing man, he will be remembered for a very long time as we and newcomers continue reading his encouraging posts.  I think of so many other beloved MPIP family that have also passed on and remember them with the same heartfelt loss.

                                                                                Blessings of love, support and healing to all who come here as we cope with  another difficult day for our MPIP family.

                                                                                Rest in Peace Paul and thank you for all your insights and uplifting spirit you gave so freely to all here.

                                                                                Swanee

                                                                                  snow white
                                                                                  Participant

                                                                                    simply beaitifully written. (tears) Thank you for sharing your feelings, I am so touched…..Jen

                                                                                    momof4boys
                                                                                    Participant
                                                                                      Has anyone found his obituary that they can post a link to?
                                                                                      jenny22
                                                                                      Participant

                                                                                        Swanee- I dont think you could have said it any better or  described Paul more beautifully. He was an amazing man, with an undeniable spirit, and PMA (to use your acronymn).

                                                                                        There are days I want to wean myself from this board as the sadness can often be too much, but then I come back as we get involved in one  anothers lives and i feel the need to see how everyone is doing.

                                                                                        Pauls absence will be a huge void here……sending good thoughts to all who are in their own battles with this dreaded disease….

                                                                                         

                                                                                      Mat
                                                                                      Participant

                                                                                        At a loss for words–and certainly echo Swanee's sentiments.  Paul's memory is a blessing to all Stage IVers on this forum.  His fight is also a painful reminder (to me) that it isn't enough to just be diligent with this disease.

                                                                                        Cathy M
                                                                                        Participant
                                                                                          So sorry for the passing of another brave warrior. Deeply hope Paul’s family can find comfort in the many caring thoughts directed their way.
                                                                                          tschmith
                                                                                          Participant

                                                                                            Rest in peace, Paul.  You were so brave and such a hero. This is again so heartbreaking….  

                                                                                            Many prayers for his family.  

                                                                                            Terrie

                                                                                             

                                                                                             

                                                                                            CHD
                                                                                            Participant

                                                                                              Oh no, I have been away for a few weeks and this is the saddest news to return to.  It is heartbreaking.  I will miss his posts and his presence here.

                                                                                              Mamapegela
                                                                                              Participant

                                                                                                I had been off the site for awhile, trying to catch up I saw this post and my heart just sank.  What an amazing man who brought so much humor and humility to the fight.  What a loss to the world and this forum.

                                                                                                Peggy

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