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keepsake for our children

Forums General Melanoma Community keepsake for our children

  • Post
    Terra
    Participant

      Hi, my husband would like to create something for our kids, we are not sure how much time he has left and we have two daughters, a 4 year old and a 2 year and another daughter on the way in June – he mentioned something like a timecapsule, but right now our heads our spinning and I am hoping someone here could suggest something they did or a loved one did for young kids to always have – thank so much

       

      Terra  

      Hi, my husband would like to create something for our kids, we are not sure how much time he has left and we have two daughters, a 4 year old and a 2 year and another daughter on the way in June – he mentioned something like a timecapsule, but right now our heads our spinning and I am hoping someone here could suggest something they did or a loved one did for young kids to always have – thank so much

       

      Terra  

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    • Replies
        AS123
        Participant

           

          Oh Terra! My heart goes out to you. What if he wrote each daughter a letter saying why he loves her so much? Or multiple letters with one to be opened each year? A video of him with them and him talking to them? Photo book with pictures of them from shutterfly or kodak? A t-shirt quilt made out of some of his shirts so they can always snuggle up with him?  Some type of biography book that records all sorts of information about him- childhood, likes, dislikes, favorite memories, etc? Sorry, I'm not coming up with anything that great. More than anything I just want you to know that I will be praying for your family and praying that your husband finds a treatment that works! Anne

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          AS123
          Participant

             

            Oh Terra! My heart goes out to you. What if he wrote each daughter a letter saying why he loves her so much? Or multiple letters with one to be opened each year? A video of him with them and him talking to them? Photo book with pictures of them from shutterfly or kodak? A t-shirt quilt made out of some of his shirts so they can always snuggle up with him?  Some type of biography book that records all sorts of information about him- childhood, likes, dislikes, favorite memories, etc? Sorry, I'm not coming up with anything that great. More than anything I just want you to know that I will be praying for your family and praying that your husband finds a treatment that works! Anne

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            B
            Participant

              Terra- This sucks.  I know I to have a 5 year old and a 4year old and unfortunately a wife who recently passed from stage 4 melanoma.  I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what to do, long story short here are the things we did.  A video talking about my wife, who she was, what she liked, how we met and how the kids made her feel.  I would have liked to make more videos but it was very difficult.  Second is we bought buirthday cards for the kids, she simply signed love mom, or mama, we also bought cards for graduation, marriage and a first kid.  This to was extremely difficult but I told my wife how important it was to have something tangiable, and that we were not giving up the fight.  I just wante to make sure we could concentrate on the fight if and when it got bad.  One thing we had but didn't have time to do was a book that records your voice.  I am so sorry, I know how dark, lonely, scary and frustrating this journey is.  If there is anything I can do please ask.

              B

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              B
              Participant

                Terra- This sucks.  I know I to have a 5 year old and a 4year old and unfortunately a wife who recently passed from stage 4 melanoma.  I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what to do, long story short here are the things we did.  A video talking about my wife, who she was, what she liked, how we met and how the kids made her feel.  I would have liked to make more videos but it was very difficult.  Second is we bought buirthday cards for the kids, she simply signed love mom, or mama, we also bought cards for graduation, marriage and a first kid.  This to was extremely difficult but I told my wife how important it was to have something tangiable, and that we were not giving up the fight.  I just wante to make sure we could concentrate on the fight if and when it got bad.  One thing we had but didn't have time to do was a book that records your voice.  I am so sorry, I know how dark, lonely, scary and frustrating this journey is.  If there is anything I can do please ask.

                B

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                B
                Participant

                  Terra- This sucks.  I know I to have a 5 year old and a 4year old and unfortunately a wife who recently passed from stage 4 melanoma.  I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what to do, long story short here are the things we did.  A video talking about my wife, who she was, what she liked, how we met and how the kids made her feel.  I would have liked to make more videos but it was very difficult.  Second is we bought buirthday cards for the kids, she simply signed love mom, or mama, we also bought cards for graduation, marriage and a first kid.  This to was extremely difficult but I told my wife how important it was to have something tangiable, and that we were not giving up the fight.  I just wante to make sure we could concentrate on the fight if and when it got bad.  One thing we had but didn't have time to do was a book that records your voice.  I am so sorry, I know how dark, lonely, scary and frustrating this journey is.  If there is anything I can do please ask.

                  B

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                  B
                  Participant

                    Terra- This sucks.  I know I to have a 5 year old and a 4year old and unfortunately a wife who recently passed from stage 4 melanoma.  I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what to do, long story short here are the things we did.  A video talking about my wife, who she was, what she liked, how we met and how the kids made her feel.  I would have liked to make more videos but it was very difficult.  Second is we bought buirthday cards for the kids, she simply signed love mom, or mama, we also bought cards for graduation, marriage and a first kid.  This to was extremely difficult but I told my wife how important it was to have something tangiable, and that we were not giving up the fight.  I just wante to make sure we could concentrate on the fight if and when it got bad.  One thing we had but didn't have time to do was a book that records your voice.  I am so sorry, I know how dark, lonely, scary and frustrating this journey is.  If there is anything I can do please ask.

                    B

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                    JenC
                    Participant
                      Anne had so many good ideas! My husband is making videos for our children. I wish we had started earlier! We worked on making lots of memories this year, and took lots of pictures! I wish your family the best and you will be in my prayers.
                      JenC

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                      JenC
                      Participant
                        Anne had so many good ideas! My husband is making videos for our children. I wish we had started earlier! We worked on making lots of memories this year, and took lots of pictures! I wish your family the best and you will be in my prayers.
                        JenC

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                        SusanE
                        Participant

                          Terra,

                          I found a book on Amazaon, Share Your Stories Father, 201 questions to help father share his most important memories. Even if he isn't a writer, maybe the topics would help and you could video tape him telling the stories.

                          And yes Hallmark has the books to record voices, but you can also video tape him reading stories with the girls now. I am sorry you are going through this.

                          Hang in there.

                          Susan wife to Jerry Stage III

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                          SusanE
                          Participant

                            Terra,

                            I found a book on Amazaon, Share Your Stories Father, 201 questions to help father share his most important memories. Even if he isn't a writer, maybe the topics would help and you could video tape him telling the stories.

                            And yes Hallmark has the books to record voices, but you can also video tape him reading stories with the girls now. I am sorry you are going through this.

                            Hang in there.

                            Susan wife to Jerry Stage III

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                            vickirs
                            Participant

                              For Christmas i gave my 2 sons (ages 21 and 23) a cross and had an inscription put on the back "May your heart always feel my love) and my 15 year old daughter got a necklace with a pic of me and her with the same inscription on the back.   I Amost bought some photo albums where you add the pics and can record a message per page for 30 secs.  I saw them at hallmark

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                              vickirs
                              Participant

                                For Christmas i gave my 2 sons (ages 21 and 23) a cross and had an inscription put on the back "May your heart always feel my love) and my 15 year old daughter got a necklace with a pic of me and her with the same inscription on the back.   I Amost bought some photo albums where you add the pics and can record a message per page for 30 secs.  I saw them at hallmark

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                                MichaelFL
                                Participant

                                  I remember some time ago that a poster mentioned making videos/dvds of responses to major events in the childrens life such as wedddings, high school and college graduation, pregnancies, 18 or other birthdays, special events etc.

                                  Best wishes,

                                  Michael

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                                  MichaelFL
                                  Participant

                                    I remember some time ago that a poster mentioned making videos/dvds of responses to major events in the childrens life such as wedddings, high school and college graduation, pregnancies, 18 or other birthdays, special events etc.

                                    Best wishes,

                                    Michael

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                                      Terra
                                      Participant

                                        Thank-you so much everyone, please post further things if you think of them and feel free to email me at [email protected] if you hear or think of anything else and can let me know – the ideas have been great some I don't think I would ever have thought of – so many for the kids and the t-shirt quilt blanket I would love for me thank -you so very much

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                                        Terra
                                        Participant

                                          Thank-you so much everyone, please post further things if you think of them and feel free to email me at [email protected] if you hear or think of anything else and can let me know – the ideas have been great some I don't think I would ever have thought of – so many for the kids and the t-shirt quilt blanket I would love for me thank -you so very much

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                                        Ranisa
                                        Participant

                                          What a sad thing to have to think about!  Good for you guys – your children will appriciate it.  Not that I am in your shoes by any means but just trying to put myself in your childrens shoes.  Not only would I like to know that my parent loved me and thought of me often but I would like to know what they were like as a person, maybe what they thought of.  Odd things, what did they think the first time they went on a roller coaster, even politics or world events.  They will learn about them in school and they can say, "I might not be able to ask my dad what he thought when the twin towers went down, but I know because left me a letter or video telling me."  Things like that seem unimportant but it is a way to remember not only him but who he was.  I would also google ideas for it.  I think someone above mentioned a book about things that they wanted to ask.  VERY GOOD IDEA!

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                                          Ranisa
                                          Participant

                                            What a sad thing to have to think about!  Good for you guys – your children will appriciate it.  Not that I am in your shoes by any means but just trying to put myself in your childrens shoes.  Not only would I like to know that my parent loved me and thought of me often but I would like to know what they were like as a person, maybe what they thought of.  Odd things, what did they think the first time they went on a roller coaster, even politics or world events.  They will learn about them in school and they can say, "I might not be able to ask my dad what he thought when the twin towers went down, but I know because left me a letter or video telling me."  Things like that seem unimportant but it is a way to remember not only him but who he was.  I would also google ideas for it.  I think someone above mentioned a book about things that they wanted to ask.  VERY GOOD IDEA!

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                                            Sherron
                                            Participant

                                              Hi Terra – I really don't have any better suggestions than others gave you….I just wanted you to know I care, and my prayers are with you…..In September as Jim was beginning to decline, my daughter has a friend, who used to be a photographer, that came down, and we went to a Park and took family photos, …we were all dressed, brown, turquoise, white, jeans…looked good…..We had both of our children, their spouses and all of our grandchildren….THOSE FAMILY PHOTOS MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.  I know he did not feel well that day, and I saw new enlarged lymphnodes and tumors, but Jim went along with it…He did it for us…I especially love one of us.  My daughter had it enlarged for me and I have framed it, and several others…one sits on my desk of us with our grandchildren her at my work.  I am so glad I thought of doing this….I miss him so much…we were together, just 4 days short of 43 years.  He passed on Nov 30, 2010.  I think, Terra, you have received some wonderful ideas…..Hugs and prayers being sent to you.

                                              Take Care,

                                              Sherron, wife to Jim FOREVER

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                                              Sherron
                                              Participant

                                                Hi Terra – I really don't have any better suggestions than others gave you….I just wanted you to know I care, and my prayers are with you…..In September as Jim was beginning to decline, my daughter has a friend, who used to be a photographer, that came down, and we went to a Park and took family photos, …we were all dressed, brown, turquoise, white, jeans…looked good…..We had both of our children, their spouses and all of our grandchildren….THOSE FAMILY PHOTOS MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.  I know he did not feel well that day, and I saw new enlarged lymphnodes and tumors, but Jim went along with it…He did it for us…I especially love one of us.  My daughter had it enlarged for me and I have framed it, and several others…one sits on my desk of us with our grandchildren her at my work.  I am so glad I thought of doing this….I miss him so much…we were together, just 4 days short of 43 years.  He passed on Nov 30, 2010.  I think, Terra, you have received some wonderful ideas…..Hugs and prayers being sent to you.

                                                Take Care,

                                                Sherron, wife to Jim FOREVER

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                                                ChrisTheWilsonZoo
                                                Participant

                                                  Terra, I'm so sorry for your family.  I know this is hard.  I lost my father unexpectedly when I was 9.  Some of the things that are important to me now are the little things you might not think to save.  Things I am so grateful to have now are some of the things that tell me about him as the man he was other than my daddy.  Someone had pretty much packed up all his personal items for my mom, and put them into a box.  That box found its way into the attic, where I found it 35+ years later.  It was like a personal time capsule – it included his wallet, personal items from his car and work, the top of his dresser where he had emptied his pants pockets after work – even his sunglasses were in there.  The wallet was a real treasure – think about what's in your wallet, it tells a lot about you.  Your driver's license, maybe a pay stub (my Dad's pay stub from 35 years ago was a real shock!), pictures of people/things important to you, etc.

                                                  The box also included his baby book and bible, which provided a treasure trove of family history I could never have found otherwise.  Things I wish I could have had – more pictures of my Dad as a child/teenager.  Children(and adults) like being able to look at pictures of their parents and see elements of themselves in them.  (All my father's children, regardless of the mother, bear similar features that can be seen in my father's childhood pictures.  When some of us met for the first time ever last year, there was absolutely no doubt we were related!)

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                                                  ChrisTheWilsonZoo
                                                  Participant

                                                    Terra, I'm so sorry for your family.  I know this is hard.  I lost my father unexpectedly when I was 9.  Some of the things that are important to me now are the little things you might not think to save.  Things I am so grateful to have now are some of the things that tell me about him as the man he was other than my daddy.  Someone had pretty much packed up all his personal items for my mom, and put them into a box.  That box found its way into the attic, where I found it 35+ years later.  It was like a personal time capsule – it included his wallet, personal items from his car and work, the top of his dresser where he had emptied his pants pockets after work – even his sunglasses were in there.  The wallet was a real treasure – think about what's in your wallet, it tells a lot about you.  Your driver's license, maybe a pay stub (my Dad's pay stub from 35 years ago was a real shock!), pictures of people/things important to you, etc.

                                                    The box also included his baby book and bible, which provided a treasure trove of family history I could never have found otherwise.  Things I wish I could have had – more pictures of my Dad as a child/teenager.  Children(and adults) like being able to look at pictures of their parents and see elements of themselves in them.  (All my father's children, regardless of the mother, bear similar features that can be seen in my father's childhood pictures.  When some of us met for the first time ever last year, there was absolutely no doubt we were related!)

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