› Forums › General Melanoma Community › So scared – newly diagnosed insitu
- This topic has 6 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 5 months ago by
MelanomaMike.
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- December 14, 2017 at 7:30 pm
Hi
I found out on Tuesday that I have a melanoma insitu and it was cut out that afternoon. The doctor told me I was very lucky it was caught so early and it has 100% success rate. While this is the best case scenario I can’t stop crying and feeling so scared.
I’m from the UK, red haur, fair, freckles and now live in oz (3 years). The past few years I’ve been very careful in the sun but growing up for years I sunbathed, use sun beds, have burnt and blistered so many times I’ve lost count
I turned 40 last week -actually had the biopsies on my birthday! I have 3 very young children (1,3 and 5) and I’m so scared of something happening to me and me leaving them in this world.
Whilst its great the melanoma was still insitu im so scared given my colouring and huge sun exposure that sone thing more serious is round the corner. You hear lots of stories of things more serious coming back and it’s just scaring me so much I don’t want my kids growing up without a mum – I can’t cope with the thought and I’m a mess.
I’m crying constantly and just can’t stop thinking about my kids. I need to go for 3/12 check ups but I’m worried that’s not enough.
My my other question is that this melanoma was found by luck at a skin clinic – not a dermatologist. And the same guy cut it out. He’s a specialist GP. The report said clear margins but how do I know if clear enough. Should I ask to get more cut off? I’m trying to get in to a dermatologist but that won’t be for 2 months as so booked up here.
Thank you for listening and any positive words so welcomed
x
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- December 14, 2017 at 8:23 pm
Hi Sarah,
I was recently where you are… newly diagnosed, and completely scared by everything I read about Melanoma. I too am a red head who abused my skin when I was younger. Now 44 with a melanoma diagnosis and with such regret! I can tell you that the more you educate your self, the better you will feel. You will learn that you are very blessed to have caught this when in situ, and very blessed that it is now gone! You can spend a lot of time and anxiety visiting all of the what-ifs, but you really should feel comforted to know 99% of the time for cases like you (and me at 1A) you will never see melanoma again. Just be vigilant with your skin checks and take advantage of this reminder that life is very precious (and pray for the warriors here who are battling this monster)! That said, with in situ and all melanoma the best practice is to remove a bit more skin and tissue around the original site to really make sure everything is cleaned up. I think that margin of safety is 0.5 cm for insitu. So, please do follow up with a good dermatologist who specializes in melanoma.
Take care,
Anne
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- December 14, 2017 at 10:11 pm
In situ carries all the fear of a cancer diagnosis, without all the bad outcome. However, it's not easy to resolve the two scenarios in your mind. Time will help – and staying offline. The more you research online, the more anxiety you will feel. This I know from experience and being on this site for over 15 years. I suggest you ask for a copy of your pathology report. That should tell you if there were wide enough margins taken. At least 5mm. As a reminder, the vast majority of melanoma warriors only have ONE melanoma occurrence. About 10% may have more than one. So, the best way to conquer your fear is to make a plan. Take care of the things you can control and let go the rest. So you'll see a doc 4 times a year. Great. In the meantime, take some pictures of your existing moles. Take them close up, then further away so you can orient where they are. This will help you also monitor new moles – since they carry the highest risk of being problematic. (A new study suggests about 70% of melanomas arise on new lesions). If you see your doc regularly, then monitor your monthly on your own, you have a solid plan of attack to stay on top of things. You are looking for change, but also things like sores that don't heal. I say that because the other types of skin cancers may present that way and with your sun history and skin type, you are likely to get those skin cancers as well over time. Not necessarily life threatening, but they can be disfiguring to remove if they get large.
1. Regular doc appts
2. Pictures of your skin
3. Monthly self skin checks
4. Sun safety – and make sure your kids understand sun safety better than you did (or we all did)
Those are the things you can control and that's what you need to focus on. In situ has such a great prognosis that you've just had the warning shot across the bow and now you can LIVE and learn. Remember this, if you let melanoma steal away your life now, it's already won regardless if you were ever to deal with melanoma again. Don't let it have that power over you. LIVE!
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- December 15, 2017 at 9:12 am
Thank you both for your replies. They really help when I read them…. but I find after a short time the feelings come back and I get so scared. Being Christmas the kids are so excited and I’d been looking forward to these holidays so much. But I can’t snap out of it and I can’t stop the thoughts of what if this time next year I’m dealing with something much bigger.
I’m scared as I know how badly my skin has been damaged and I can’t believe my melanoma journey will stop here.
I know it’s not healthy and I know it’s pointless aNfnk shouldn’t think this. And I feel bad as there are so many incredible people on this site who are dealing with so much worse than me. But I can’t stop thinking of my children and the pain they will be put through.
Anne- I’ve never heard that 99% statistic but it is positive. Do you know where you heard it? And are you getting 3 monthly checks still?
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.
x
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- December 15, 2017 at 9:14 am
Oh one more thing…. I got my pathology report back and it said the margins weee only 3mm! I called the doctor and he said he’d taken more than that but the skin can shrink before it gets to the lab!? I feel very nervous by this reply….I’m not convinced.
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- December 15, 2017 at 1:04 pm
Hi Sarah, you have received some great advice in this thread, most of which I need to follow too. Two months ago I knew zilch about melanoma. Then a whirlwind diagnosis, surgery, and reconstruction. I have learned a lot in the last two months, and because my biopsy was a 2A, I was more worried than warrented. I do have to be vigilant on my every 3 month skin checks now, but it feels good to be out of the chaos and feeling calmer. It was kinda bummer that my nose is disfigured from the new graft but I then remember the positive side which is I don't need chemo and the cancer is GONE! Each day will get better for you as you get through this shock. Think of all the people that love and support you; its ok to be the "cared-for" one this time.
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- December 18, 2017 at 5:37 am
Hi Sarah, thank God you caught this one early, youll get over the "scared" part, quit Tanning at the booths, be proactive with UV lotions, stay covered and be cautious!
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