› Forums › General Melanoma Community › Newly diagnosed and scared
- This topic has 15 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 3 months ago by
Everymoment.
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- January 23, 2017 at 5:45 pm
I had a mole on my upper left arm that I had been suspicious of for a few years now. I have had moles removed before for cosmetic reasons and dont know why I never requested this one to be removed. For years people have been pointing it out and saying I should get it checked. Multiple doctors looked at it and would say its fine even though I would say I think it's getting bigger. I wish I had just followed my gut instincts and had it removed but too late now. I had been meaning to get it checked for months and finally did early January when I was at an appt for my severe anxiety and depression. Again I swore that it was getting bigger. This time my doctor said we would biopsy it and referred me to another doctor in the clinic.
Long story short he referred me to a dermatologist but it was a 3 and a half week wait so I went back into his office and requested he remove the thing entirely and he books me in for a couple days time. Looking at it he said it is probably only 10% chance melanoma but best to get it removed if I'm paranoid. A week later I go in for results and it's melanoma. ( I kinda knew though as I had missed the appt and they rang me to tell me I needed to come in. I was told by my original DR they had got it all and I requested the pathology report to go over with my brother in law who is a surgeon. ( So glad I remembered to get the report before I left or it would of been a long night of horror not knowing exactly what I was looking at ) From the report they hadn't got it all. The next day I went back to the gp who removed it to get a referral to a melanoma clinic as my brother in law suggested and he told me it was in situ. I had to tell him, no it's invasive… clarks level 3. He didn't know what a clarks level was, I googled it for him. He didn't give me the right referral and I have to go back again tomorrow and try to get the right one. I found out Friday night and have been sick with anxiety, cant sleep… just dozing off here and there and waking up startled believing I'm dying. The report is pretty good, it's the regression that has me sick with worry and the fact there is still tumour in my arm. I have also had symptoms the past few months that are not normal for me that I have googled and of course it's cancer to the internet. I also have a sore right armpit presently so I'm terrified. Over the past few days I have spent my time on here reading posts. I know I should stay of the internet but this site has helped. Sorry for the babbling, with my anxiety I tend to over share lol
Here is my pathology report.
Diagnosis:
Skin excision, left deltoid:
– Superficial spreading melanoma, 12 mm
– Clark level III, Breslow thickness .47 mm
– No ulceration; mitotic rate less than 1/mm2; ( insufficient intradermal tumour for proper count ) -Regression present
– Peripheral margin involvedHost immune response: Present
Regression: PresentMicrosatellites: Absent
Vascular Invasion: Not identified
Perinueral Infiltration: Not identifiedPredominant cell type: Epithelioid
Desmoplasia: AbsentAssociation with a coexistent Benign Melanocytic Lesion: Absent
Margins of Excision:
-Tumour extends to superficial
-Deep excision margin 3 mmThanks so much for your time
Michelle 🙂
- Replies
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:09 pm
Hang in there Michelle. With my Dad we never found a primary, so I am unfamiliar with your report. There are many on here much more familiar with whats going on with you. Please try to relax, most often the initial shock sends us into a panic, which you will see will eventually get better as you know more about your diagnosis. Its all going to be ok.
Best.
Jen
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:53 pm
Thanks so much Jen, sorry to hear about your dad. My anxiety gets so much worse when I cant sleep so it's a vicious cycle. I have quite heavy up and downs with thinking I'll be ok one minute then convinced it's going to be a lot worse than expected the next. Your words give me momentary relief, I appreciate it. The hardest part is the what ifs…. I have had the mole all my life and I KNEW it was getting bigger over the past few years but just never pushed when I was told it was fine. If onlys are the worst. Always follow your gut instincts… I'm not one to question a professional opinion though. Lesson learnt. Onwards and upwards, I will get there 🙂
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:53 pm
Thanks so much Jen, sorry to hear about your dad. My anxiety gets so much worse when I cant sleep so it's a vicious cycle. I have quite heavy up and downs with thinking I'll be ok one minute then convinced it's going to be a lot worse than expected the next. Your words give me momentary relief, I appreciate it. The hardest part is the what ifs…. I have had the mole all my life and I KNEW it was getting bigger over the past few years but just never pushed when I was told it was fine. If onlys are the worst. Always follow your gut instincts… I'm not one to question a professional opinion though. Lesson learnt. Onwards and upwards, I will get there 🙂
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:53 pm
Thanks so much Jen, sorry to hear about your dad. My anxiety gets so much worse when I cant sleep so it's a vicious cycle. I have quite heavy up and downs with thinking I'll be ok one minute then convinced it's going to be a lot worse than expected the next. Your words give me momentary relief, I appreciate it. The hardest part is the what ifs…. I have had the mole all my life and I KNEW it was getting bigger over the past few years but just never pushed when I was told it was fine. If onlys are the worst. Always follow your gut instincts… I'm not one to question a professional opinion though. Lesson learnt. Onwards and upwards, I will get there 🙂
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:09 pm
Hang in there Michelle. With my Dad we never found a primary, so I am unfamiliar with your report. There are many on here much more familiar with whats going on with you. Please try to relax, most often the initial shock sends us into a panic, which you will see will eventually get better as you know more about your diagnosis. Its all going to be ok.
Best.
Jen
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:09 pm
Hang in there Michelle. With my Dad we never found a primary, so I am unfamiliar with your report. There are many on here much more familiar with whats going on with you. Please try to relax, most often the initial shock sends us into a panic, which you will see will eventually get better as you know more about your diagnosis. Its all going to be ok.
Best.
Jen
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:41 pm
We definitely understand how hearing the word melanoma brings much anxiety and many questions. One thing to know: you've caught it early! It's only stage 1A, which is one step after in situ (stage 0). They will do a wide local excision to remove extra tissue around the area and you'll have a scar but that's it. Clarks level is really not important, my report doesn't even have that listed since a lot of places are doing away with it. The breslow thickness is the main thing you need to know, and yours is thin at .47mm, so that is great news.
Try to take a deep breath. You've caught it early. Don't listen to the rare cases on here where early stagers years later progress. You have a 95% chance of never dealing with this melanoma again, those are super awesome odds in the cancer world! Hopefully once you get the WLE and some time goes by, your anxiety will start to go down and you can get back to living life as normal again.
All the best,
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- January 23, 2017 at 7:00 pm
Thank you Jen 😀 It was googling regression that threw me into a spin. Although I have seen some recent reports that are saying it could work in favour… it all gets a little confusing. My anxiety was extreme before the diagnosis, I was actually visiting the doctor as it was getting to a point where I was feeling sick having to leave the house. Although medication hasn't really helped over the years I had gone in to try again as it was getting too much. Probably a good thing I started meds a week and a half before getting the diagnosis 🙂 I'm so glad I posted, having others to talk to that can share my experience really makes a difference 😀
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- January 23, 2017 at 7:00 pm
Thank you Jen 😀 It was googling regression that threw me into a spin. Although I have seen some recent reports that are saying it could work in favour… it all gets a little confusing. My anxiety was extreme before the diagnosis, I was actually visiting the doctor as it was getting to a point where I was feeling sick having to leave the house. Although medication hasn't really helped over the years I had gone in to try again as it was getting too much. Probably a good thing I started meds a week and a half before getting the diagnosis 🙂 I'm so glad I posted, having others to talk to that can share my experience really makes a difference 😀
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- January 23, 2017 at 7:00 pm
Thank you Jen 😀 It was googling regression that threw me into a spin. Although I have seen some recent reports that are saying it could work in favour… it all gets a little confusing. My anxiety was extreme before the diagnosis, I was actually visiting the doctor as it was getting to a point where I was feeling sick having to leave the house. Although medication hasn't really helped over the years I had gone in to try again as it was getting too much. Probably a good thing I started meds a week and a half before getting the diagnosis 🙂 I'm so glad I posted, having others to talk to that can share my experience really makes a difference 😀
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:41 pm
We definitely understand how hearing the word melanoma brings much anxiety and many questions. One thing to know: you've caught it early! It's only stage 1A, which is one step after in situ (stage 0). They will do a wide local excision to remove extra tissue around the area and you'll have a scar but that's it. Clarks level is really not important, my report doesn't even have that listed since a lot of places are doing away with it. The breslow thickness is the main thing you need to know, and yours is thin at .47mm, so that is great news.
Try to take a deep breath. You've caught it early. Don't listen to the rare cases on here where early stagers years later progress. You have a 95% chance of never dealing with this melanoma again, those are super awesome odds in the cancer world! Hopefully once you get the WLE and some time goes by, your anxiety will start to go down and you can get back to living life as normal again.
All the best,
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- January 23, 2017 at 6:41 pm
We definitely understand how hearing the word melanoma brings much anxiety and many questions. One thing to know: you've caught it early! It's only stage 1A, which is one step after in situ (stage 0). They will do a wide local excision to remove extra tissue around the area and you'll have a scar but that's it. Clarks level is really not important, my report doesn't even have that listed since a lot of places are doing away with it. The breslow thickness is the main thing you need to know, and yours is thin at .47mm, so that is great news.
Try to take a deep breath. You've caught it early. Don't listen to the rare cases on here where early stagers years later progress. You have a 95% chance of never dealing with this melanoma again, those are super awesome odds in the cancer world! Hopefully once you get the WLE and some time goes by, your anxiety will start to go down and you can get back to living life as normal again.
All the best,
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- January 24, 2017 at 1:08 am
Good instincts to get it checked! That is a pretty thin melanoma so your vigilance paid off. When something/anything is going on with your body…..The rest of your body reacts. So your other symptoms are more likely to be a stress response to what your going through. -
- January 24, 2017 at 1:08 am
Good instincts to get it checked! That is a pretty thin melanoma so your vigilance paid off. When something/anything is going on with your body…..The rest of your body reacts. So your other symptoms are more likely to be a stress response to what your going through. -
- January 24, 2017 at 1:08 am
Good instincts to get it checked! That is a pretty thin melanoma so your vigilance paid off. When something/anything is going on with your body…..The rest of your body reacts. So your other symptoms are more likely to be a stress response to what your going through.
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Tagged: cutaneous melanoma
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