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Hospice Decision

Forums General Melanoma Community Hospice Decision

  • Post
    Shaneswife
    Participant

      It's with a heavy and broken heart, that after a lot of talking, Shane has decided to cease life sustaining therapies. He wants to spend what time he has left enjoying family. We have in home hospice supports being put into place. My heart is shattered but I understand that this has weighed heavily on his heart but this is the right decision for Shane. 

       

      Janis

    Viewing 10 reply threads
    • Replies
        Jeff_in_FL
        Participant

          So very sorry to hear the news, Janis. Prayers, love, and hugs!

          jennunicorn
          Participant

            So so sorry Janis, I cannot imagine what you're going through. Sending love to you and Shane.

            Patrisa
            Participant

              Oh Janis, 

              there are no words to make this decision any easier, I personally would never support it, but it is not upon us to decide what our loved one needs or wants…

              It just breaks my heart to hear that Shane decided that, but until we walk in their shoes we can't really relate…

              I trully hope this decision brings both of you peace and as much time together as possible…

              Praying for you….

              Love,

              Patrisa

              rabbits68
              Participant
                Praying for your family that you will have a special time together.
                sister of patient
                Participant

                  I too am absolutely heartsick to hear this. Holding a special place in my heart for both of you – and praying for a miracle!!!

                  Barb

                  momof4boys
                  Participant

                    Janis, so sorry to hear about Shane. There seems to be so much sadness on this board lately! I know your heart is breaking and so mine breaks for you at this time. Just cherish what time you have and have hope you will see him again without all the pain and suffering. Prayers for your family

                    Bubbles
                    Participant

                      I am sorry for all that you and Shane have endured so bravely.  You can be assured that he knows you have been all that he could have ever imagined to wish for as a lover, friend, advocate and caregiver.  That is no small gift.  Holding you both in my heart.  Celeste

                      Christine.P
                      Participant

                        I am heartbroken for you, Janis. Thank you for sharing Shane's journey with us. Wishing you peace. 

                        maperny
                        Participant

                          Janis,

                          I am so sorry that Shane has reached this point but wanted to share with you about our experience.  My husband, Juan, made the same decision to opt out of further treatment back in January and I am so glad he did (although hard to accept initially).  The treatment would have been extremely harsh, long hospital stay and dubious results (LMD treatment).

                          Once there were no longer side effects from treatment. we had a few wonderful months together and he was feeling better and sleeping better than he had in over a year.  We knew this would be temporary but as he was able to be at peace with his decision it helped us all.

                          We were both much less anxious and just focussed on being together as a family with our young son and enjoying what we could.  

                          I decided that best we could, we would have smiles and love, I saved my tears until after it was over.  Now it has been 6 weeks since we lost him and it is very, very hard but I am so glad he didn't die in the middle of another treatment that would have been so rough on him and us.  He didn't want us to have that memory nor go through anymore himself.

                          My heart goes out to you, what a wonderful care-giver and support you are to your beloved Shane.  May this time together bring precious memories filled with love.

                          Maria

                            Patrisa
                            Participant

                              Dear Maria,

                              you are amazing, between your own loss, you still come here and show support for others, I really admire you…

                              Love,

                              Patrisa

                              maperny
                              Participant

                                Thank you, Patrisa.  I find it helps to support each other although I was incognito for over a month and shall see how I do in terms of continuing to be on the forum.

                                take care

                                maria

                              AliCat61
                              Participant

                                My heart goes out to you and Shane, Janis. I am so sorry. I am also very proud of you for supporting Shane in doing what feels right for him, in spite of your own pain. It is never easy to lose someone that we love. So often our instincts are to FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT! And we to push our loved ones to do that too. They will fight as long as they can. The human instinct to survive is strong. I can see how very much you love him, as you are supporting him, even at great personal cost, in his decision to surrender the fight with grace and dignity. Sending love, prayers, good vibes, and healing thoughts for YOU in this difficult time. 

                                RitysMom
                                Participant

                                  Praying for a miracle!

                              Viewing 10 reply threads
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