The information on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Content within the patient forum is user-generated and has not been reviewed by medical professionals. Other sections of the Melanoma Research Foundation website include information that has been reviewed by medical professionals as appropriate. All medical decisions should be made in consultation with your doctor or other qualified medical professional.

Anxious and have some questions

Forums General Melanoma Community Anxious and have some questions

  • Post
    ScaredV
    Participant

      Hello everyone,

      I'm sad to be posting here, but hoping to find some support and answers.

      My fiance was diagnosed with melanoma in April.  The lesion was 2x2cm and it was on his jawline.  It looked like a patch of eczema. Long story short, he had this spot on his face for 5 years, we were told it was a fungal infection, he took all sorts of creams for it, it didn't go away.  Finially a dermatologist decided to biopsy it and it turned out to be melanoma.  Since it was a large spot, only part of it was biopsied and we were told it was only .34mm.  

      He had the WLE surgery preformed but they did not check lymph nodes at that time due to the fact that they thought it was only .34mm.  After the surgery, we found out at it's deepest point it was actually 1.23mm with a mitotic rate of 2 (this was only at the deepest point,  there were all different depths and some areas were in situ).  The surgery was a success and the margins were clear.  The surgeon who did the WLE did not want to test his lymph nodes but his dermatologist has decided he does want to test the lymph nodes so we will be meeting with a second surgeon in the next few weeks.  

      This whole experience has caused extreme anxiety for me.  I am so worried about him and just want him to be ok.  I do have a few questions that I'm hoping you all can help me with.

      The first question is, why does one doctor want to go ahead and test the lymph nodes and one does not? What is the best course of action to take now?  I realize that because he already had surgery, the lymph node testing is not as accurate.  

      Are there any risks we should know about when testing the lymph nodes?  

      My final and most important question is considering this new information and the location of the melanoma, what are the chances that this has spread to the lymph nodes?  I am so terrified of hearing the results of this and I am unsure what the chances are that this may have spread.  I realize every case is different but if anyone has any numbers or experiences they could share, I would greatly appreciate it.

      Thank you so much

    Viewing 14 reply threads
    • Replies
        Janner
        Participant

          There is a problem testing the lymph nodes AFTER the wide excision.  Basically, you are testing the Sentinel Node – this means the very first lymph node that the lesion drains to.  They inject a radioactive tracer and/or dye into the lesion and trace it to the first lymph node in the chain.  The problem comes after you have the WLE.  The first node in the chain may not be the same one anymore.  Removing a large chunk of skin may change the drainage patterns.   So if the result is positive, it's positive.  But if it is negative, there will always be a question to whether or not this was THE sentinel node. 

          The first surgeon may understand that there is limited data in doing a SNB after the WLE.  He also may want to save face.  Who knows?  A second opinion never hurts, but my problem is with any doctor that says they can guarantee they will find the sentinel node — I wouldn't believe them. 

          As for risks, yes, there are risks.  It is surgery, typically done under a general anesthesia.  There is the risk of lymphedema and other surgical complications.  Not common, but certainly a possibility.  You'd want to have someone who is VERY experienced in SNBs doing this (if you decide to go that route).

          No way to predict spread at this point.  Too variable.   Just take it one day at a time.  This isn't a death sentence, but it is something to be respectful of. 

          Hang in there!

          Janner
          Participant

            There is a problem testing the lymph nodes AFTER the wide excision.  Basically, you are testing the Sentinel Node – this means the very first lymph node that the lesion drains to.  They inject a radioactive tracer and/or dye into the lesion and trace it to the first lymph node in the chain.  The problem comes after you have the WLE.  The first node in the chain may not be the same one anymore.  Removing a large chunk of skin may change the drainage patterns.   So if the result is positive, it's positive.  But if it is negative, there will always be a question to whether or not this was THE sentinel node. 

            The first surgeon may understand that there is limited data in doing a SNB after the WLE.  He also may want to save face.  Who knows?  A second opinion never hurts, but my problem is with any doctor that says they can guarantee they will find the sentinel node — I wouldn't believe them. 

            As for risks, yes, there are risks.  It is surgery, typically done under a general anesthesia.  There is the risk of lymphedema and other surgical complications.  Not common, but certainly a possibility.  You'd want to have someone who is VERY experienced in SNBs doing this (if you decide to go that route).

            No way to predict spread at this point.  Too variable.   Just take it one day at a time.  This isn't a death sentence, but it is something to be respectful of. 

            Hang in there!

            Janner
            Participant

              There is a problem testing the lymph nodes AFTER the wide excision.  Basically, you are testing the Sentinel Node – this means the very first lymph node that the lesion drains to.  They inject a radioactive tracer and/or dye into the lesion and trace it to the first lymph node in the chain.  The problem comes after you have the WLE.  The first node in the chain may not be the same one anymore.  Removing a large chunk of skin may change the drainage patterns.   So if the result is positive, it's positive.  But if it is negative, there will always be a question to whether or not this was THE sentinel node. 

              The first surgeon may understand that there is limited data in doing a SNB after the WLE.  He also may want to save face.  Who knows?  A second opinion never hurts, but my problem is with any doctor that says they can guarantee they will find the sentinel node — I wouldn't believe them. 

              As for risks, yes, there are risks.  It is surgery, typically done under a general anesthesia.  There is the risk of lymphedema and other surgical complications.  Not common, but certainly a possibility.  You'd want to have someone who is VERY experienced in SNBs doing this (if you decide to go that route).

              No way to predict spread at this point.  Too variable.   Just take it one day at a time.  This isn't a death sentence, but it is something to be respectful of. 

              Hang in there!

              Gene_S
              Participant

                Is he seeing a Melanoma Specialist either in the dermatologist or the surgeon.  If not that would be first line of action is to find one and take all my information to him and see what he says.

                Judy (loving wife of Gene Stage IV and now NED)

                  ScaredV
                  Participant

                    Hi Judy,

                    The dermatologist is not a melanoma specialist as far as I know.  But I am ever greatful to him for testing this patch of skin that other doctors just dismissed as a fungas infection.  The first surgeon we went to see was an ENT specialist who deals with Melanoma as well.  Again, I don't know if he is a specialist.  Now we are going to see a second surgeon for a second opinion as well but I'm not sure if he is a melanoma specialist.  I will ask when we see him.  I am in Toronto, Ontario.  I am wondering how I can go about finding a specialist who will be able to guide us through what the best course of action is. 

                     

                    Any suggestions?

                    Thank you.

                    ScaredV
                    Participant

                      Hi Judy,

                      The dermatologist is not a melanoma specialist as far as I know.  But I am ever greatful to him for testing this patch of skin that other doctors just dismissed as a fungas infection.  The first surgeon we went to see was an ENT specialist who deals with Melanoma as well.  Again, I don't know if he is a specialist.  Now we are going to see a second surgeon for a second opinion as well but I'm not sure if he is a melanoma specialist.  I will ask when we see him.  I am in Toronto, Ontario.  I am wondering how I can go about finding a specialist who will be able to guide us through what the best course of action is. 

                       

                      Any suggestions?

                      Thank you.

                      Janner
                      Participant

                        Canada seems to have different protocols than the US so I guess this makes more sense now.  I do know there ARE melanoma specialists in Toronto, but I'm not sure how you'd go about seeing them. 

                        Janner
                        Participant

                          Canada seems to have different protocols than the US so I guess this makes more sense now.  I do know there ARE melanoma specialists in Toronto, but I'm not sure how you'd go about seeing them. 

                          Janner
                          Participant

                            Canada seems to have different protocols than the US so I guess this makes more sense now.  I do know there ARE melanoma specialists in Toronto, but I'm not sure how you'd go about seeing them. 

                            ScaredV
                            Participant

                              Hi Judy,

                              The dermatologist is not a melanoma specialist as far as I know.  But I am ever greatful to him for testing this patch of skin that other doctors just dismissed as a fungas infection.  The first surgeon we went to see was an ENT specialist who deals with Melanoma as well.  Again, I don't know if he is a specialist.  Now we are going to see a second surgeon for a second opinion as well but I'm not sure if he is a melanoma specialist.  I will ask when we see him.  I am in Toronto, Ontario.  I am wondering how I can go about finding a specialist who will be able to guide us through what the best course of action is. 

                               

                              Any suggestions?

                              Thank you.

                            Gene_S
                            Participant

                              Is he seeing a Melanoma Specialist either in the dermatologist or the surgeon.  If not that would be first line of action is to find one and take all my information to him and see what he says.

                              Judy (loving wife of Gene Stage IV and now NED)

                              Gene_S
                              Participant

                                Is he seeing a Melanoma Specialist either in the dermatologist or the surgeon.  If not that would be first line of action is to find one and take all my information to him and see what he says.

                                Judy (loving wife of Gene Stage IV and now NED)

                                brittanyx
                                Participant
                                  I’m 19 and I’m stage lll. We didn’t think mine was as deep as it was either until after they took out 3 of my lymph nodes and one came out positive. I just had surgery again a week ago to take the rest of my lymph nodes out. If the time comes where they say it’s clear to take the lymph nodes out I think he should. It’s better to be safe. Stay strong through this. Sending positive thoughts your guys’ way!
                                  brittanyx
                                  Participant
                                    I’m 19 and I’m stage lll. We didn’t think mine was as deep as it was either until after they took out 3 of my lymph nodes and one came out positive. I just had surgery again a week ago to take the rest of my lymph nodes out. If the time comes where they say it’s clear to take the lymph nodes out I think he should. It’s better to be safe. Stay strong through this. Sending positive thoughts your guys’ way!
                                      ScaredV
                                      Participant

                                        I am so sorry for your diagnosis and at such a young age.  I'm sure it must be very scary as it has been very scary for us as well.  Can I ask what the depth and location of your melanoma was? Also, did you test the lymph nodes after the surgery?

                                        Thank you for your thoughts and your replies.

                                         

                                        ScaredV
                                        Participant

                                          I am so sorry for your diagnosis and at such a young age.  I'm sure it must be very scary as it has been very scary for us as well.  Can I ask what the depth and location of your melanoma was? Also, did you test the lymph nodes after the surgery?

                                          Thank you for your thoughts and your replies.

                                           

                                          brittanyx
                                          Participant

                                            It's been very overwhelming. Mine was 1.65 I believe. It's on the back of my right arm. My first surgery was may 12th and they took 3 out to biopsy. One came out negative so they said once my swelling went down from that surgery they'd do surgery again and take all the lymph nodes out, and that was a little over a week ago. 

                                            brittanyx
                                            Participant

                                              It's been very overwhelming. Mine was 1.65 I believe. It's on the back of my right arm. My first surgery was may 12th and they took 3 out to biopsy. One came out negative so they said once my swelling went down from that surgery they'd do surgery again and take all the lymph nodes out, and that was a little over a week ago. 

                                              brittanyx
                                              Participant

                                                It's been very overwhelming. Mine was 1.65 I believe. It's on the back of my right arm. My first surgery was may 12th and they took 3 out to biopsy. One came out negative so they said once my swelling went down from that surgery they'd do surgery again and take all the lymph nodes out, and that was a little over a week ago. 

                                                ScaredV
                                                Participant

                                                  I am so sorry for your diagnosis and at such a young age.  I'm sure it must be very scary as it has been very scary for us as well.  Can I ask what the depth and location of your melanoma was? Also, did you test the lymph nodes after the surgery?

                                                  Thank you for your thoughts and your replies.

                                                   

                                                brittanyx
                                                Participant
                                                  I’m 19 and I’m stage lll. We didn’t think mine was as deep as it was either until after they took out 3 of my lymph nodes and one came out positive. I just had surgery again a week ago to take the rest of my lymph nodes out. If the time comes where they say it’s clear to take the lymph nodes out I think he should. It’s better to be safe. Stay strong through this. Sending positive thoughts your guys’ way!
                                                  AmandaLivingston
                                                  Participant

                                                    So sorry to hear about your fiancé. My husband of 8 months just went thru this same process and was diagnosed stage IV over the course of the last months worth if tests and surgeries, He had the primary tumor removed from his scalp and removed the sentinel lymph node which as others have mentioned is determined using nuclear tracing. Technology is incredible and they do everything they can to make sure they are getting the right one or ones and nothing extra. My husband ended up only needing one removed from behind his left ear but they can be pretty much anywhere. He also did MRI And PET scans to determine where else it had spread. 

                                                    He has a melanoma specialist and had a specialized head & neck surgeon do his surgery. You're dermatologist or GP should be able to recommend a specialist even if they are far away they should review his results and pathology reports. We're at UCSF in SF, California but got a second opinion from Sloan Kettering cancer hospital in NYC. 

                                                    The most important lesson I'm learning thru this process is that you both need to be his best advocate – do your research, follow up if you don't hear back on something, be persistent. I understand exactly how scary it is but just be there and focus on how to get him thru it and get the best treatment possible.  Best of luck to you both and  if you're not sleeping I recommend Ambien – it's a stressful process and sleep is crucial for both of you. 

                                                    AmandaLivingston
                                                    Participant

                                                      So sorry to hear about your fiancé. My husband of 8 months just went thru this same process and was diagnosed stage IV over the course of the last months worth if tests and surgeries, He had the primary tumor removed from his scalp and removed the sentinel lymph node which as others have mentioned is determined using nuclear tracing. Technology is incredible and they do everything they can to make sure they are getting the right one or ones and nothing extra. My husband ended up only needing one removed from behind his left ear but they can be pretty much anywhere. He also did MRI And PET scans to determine where else it had spread. 

                                                      He has a melanoma specialist and had a specialized head & neck surgeon do his surgery. You're dermatologist or GP should be able to recommend a specialist even if they are far away they should review his results and pathology reports. We're at UCSF in SF, California but got a second opinion from Sloan Kettering cancer hospital in NYC. 

                                                      The most important lesson I'm learning thru this process is that you both need to be his best advocate – do your research, follow up if you don't hear back on something, be persistent. I understand exactly how scary it is but just be there and focus on how to get him thru it and get the best treatment possible.  Best of luck to you both and  if you're not sleeping I recommend Ambien – it's a stressful process and sleep is crucial for both of you. 

                                                        ScaredV
                                                        Participant

                                                          I am so sorry to hear of your husband's diagnosis. Thank you for taking the time to respond. Its so hard to deal with all this in what is supposed to be such a happy and exciting time. 

                                                          Can I ask how deep your husbands melanoma was? 

                                                          I do want to get a second opinion and I think I do want to get the lymph nodes tested, I just want some peace of mind and I dont feel like Ive had any since he was diagnosed.  

                                                          I will take your advice amd start to be a little more persistant and start pushing a bit more. I just feel so lost sometimes and I feel like this has not been taken as seriously as it should have been from the doctors we are dealing with.

                                                           

                                                          ScaredV
                                                          Participant

                                                            I am so sorry to hear of your husband's diagnosis. Thank you for taking the time to respond. Its so hard to deal with all this in what is supposed to be such a happy and exciting time. 

                                                            Can I ask how deep your husbands melanoma was? 

                                                            I do want to get a second opinion and I think I do want to get the lymph nodes tested, I just want some peace of mind and I dont feel like Ive had any since he was diagnosed.  

                                                            I will take your advice amd start to be a little more persistant and start pushing a bit more. I just feel so lost sometimes and I feel like this has not been taken as seriously as it should have been from the doctors we are dealing with.

                                                             

                                                            ScaredV
                                                            Participant

                                                              I am so sorry to hear of your husband's diagnosis. Thank you for taking the time to respond. Its so hard to deal with all this in what is supposed to be such a happy and exciting time. 

                                                              Can I ask how deep your husbands melanoma was? 

                                                              I do want to get a second opinion and I think I do want to get the lymph nodes tested, I just want some peace of mind and I dont feel like Ive had any since he was diagnosed.  

                                                              I will take your advice amd start to be a little more persistant and start pushing a bit more. I just feel so lost sometimes and I feel like this has not been taken as seriously as it should have been from the doctors we are dealing with.

                                                               

                                                            AmandaLivingston
                                                            Participant

                                                              So sorry to hear about your fiancé. My husband of 8 months just went thru this same process and was diagnosed stage IV over the course of the last months worth if tests and surgeries, He had the primary tumor removed from his scalp and removed the sentinel lymph node which as others have mentioned is determined using nuclear tracing. Technology is incredible and they do everything they can to make sure they are getting the right one or ones and nothing extra. My husband ended up only needing one removed from behind his left ear but they can be pretty much anywhere. He also did MRI And PET scans to determine where else it had spread. 

                                                              He has a melanoma specialist and had a specialized head & neck surgeon do his surgery. You're dermatologist or GP should be able to recommend a specialist even if they are far away they should review his results and pathology reports. We're at UCSF in SF, California but got a second opinion from Sloan Kettering cancer hospital in NYC. 

                                                              The most important lesson I'm learning thru this process is that you both need to be his best advocate – do your research, follow up if you don't hear back on something, be persistent. I understand exactly how scary it is but just be there and focus on how to get him thru it and get the best treatment possible.  Best of luck to you both and  if you're not sleeping I recommend Ambien – it's a stressful process and sleep is crucial for both of you. 

                                                              A
                                                              Participant

                                                                I am very sorry about your fiance  diagnosis and hope that his lymph nodes will be negative!

                                                                Becaise this melanoma presentation was very unusual, could you please describe how did it look like? was it red, pink, light brown in color? Scaly or smooth? Was it blanching when you pressed on it? Was is changing over those 5 years it was present on his skin? Thank you.

                                                                A
                                                                Participant

                                                                  I am very sorry about your fiance  diagnosis and hope that his lymph nodes will be negative!

                                                                  Becaise this melanoma presentation was very unusual, could you please describe how did it look like? was it red, pink, light brown in color? Scaly or smooth? Was it blanching when you pressed on it? Was is changing over those 5 years it was present on his skin? Thank you.

                                                                    ScaredV
                                                                    Participant

                                                                      Thank you, we are praying they come back negative. I hope that the odds are in our favour.

                                                                      It was an amelanotic melanoma.  It started off as a very small red spot on his jaw when we came back from a vacation five years ago.  It stayed pretty small for a while and he had it tested multiple times with his doctor and was told it was a fungal infection and was given steroid creams for it.  Then recently it started growing very fast and was getting more red and itchy by the day so he was referred to a dermatologist who thought it was a patch of eczema but then decided to test it just in case and it turned out to be melanoma. Really it just looked like a patch of red skin.  We never in a million years thought it would be melanoma, his doctor and the dermatologist were shocked as were we.  

                                                                      ScaredV
                                                                      Participant

                                                                        Thank you, we are praying they come back negative. I hope that the odds are in our favour.

                                                                        It was an amelanotic melanoma.  It started off as a very small red spot on his jaw when we came back from a vacation five years ago.  It stayed pretty small for a while and he had it tested multiple times with his doctor and was told it was a fungal infection and was given steroid creams for it.  Then recently it started growing very fast and was getting more red and itchy by the day so he was referred to a dermatologist who thought it was a patch of eczema but then decided to test it just in case and it turned out to be melanoma. Really it just looked like a patch of red skin.  We never in a million years thought it would be melanoma, his doctor and the dermatologist were shocked as were we.  

                                                                        ScaredV
                                                                        Participant

                                                                          Thank you, we are praying they come back negative. I hope that the odds are in our favour.

                                                                          It was an amelanotic melanoma.  It started off as a very small red spot on his jaw when we came back from a vacation five years ago.  It stayed pretty small for a while and he had it tested multiple times with his doctor and was told it was a fungal infection and was given steroid creams for it.  Then recently it started growing very fast and was getting more red and itchy by the day so he was referred to a dermatologist who thought it was a patch of eczema but then decided to test it just in case and it turned out to be melanoma. Really it just looked like a patch of red skin.  We never in a million years thought it would be melanoma, his doctor and the dermatologist were shocked as were we.  

                                                                        A
                                                                        Participant

                                                                          I am very sorry about your fiance  diagnosis and hope that his lymph nodes will be negative!

                                                                          Becaise this melanoma presentation was very unusual, could you please describe how did it look like? was it red, pink, light brown in color? Scaly or smooth? Was it blanching when you pressed on it? Was is changing over those 5 years it was present on his skin? Thank you.

                                                                      Viewing 14 reply threads
                                                                      • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
                                                                      About the MRF Patient Forum

                                                                      The MRF Patient Forum is the oldest and largest online community of people affected by melanoma. It is designed to provide peer support and information to caregivers, patients, family and friends. There is no better place to discuss different parts of your journey with this cancer and find the friends and support resources to make that journey more bearable.

                                                                      The information on the forum is open and accessible to everyone. To add a new topic or to post a reply, you must be a registered user. Please note that you will be able to post both topics and replies anonymously even though you are logged in. All posts must abide by MRF posting policies.

                                                                      Popular Topics