update on my husband

Dani,

I hope by now you've seen Miguel's onc and have had some of your questions ansered. I'm sure it's frustrating, but if she's like most oncs, she has a lot of patients to check on, plus, treatments to either oversee or adminster. Like I said, hopefully you've seen her by now.

You do still have a long way to go, just remember you'll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. You need these folks to work with you so be kind. At the same time, you're Miguel's primary advocate so you'll need to be persistent…just don't drive the drs away by being tooooo persisitent. You say you've "continuously asked nurses to page her"…asked every hour or every several minutes? How you treat them will make a difference in how they respond to you.

Now, to tackle what probably no one wants to tackle. I don't either. Dani, we all live under multiple systems and each system has its own set of rules and to get maximum benefits, a person has to go by the rules of each given system.  Federal, state, local governments, hospitals, work places, schools, you get the idea. Even our own homes have rules. Obey the rules and all goes pretty smoothly. Break the rules and there are consequences. We get that until the consequences start applying to ourselves.

To be under 30, in this country, and not have a Social, implies that, somewhere along the way, Miguel, for whatever reason, didn't play by the rules. Hear me, I'm not passing any kind of judgement or making any accusation, and I'm not asking for you to make any kind of explanation as to why he doesn't have a Social, but I am stating the obvious fact and that is that, for whatever reason, he didn't get a Social and he has to have one in order to get maximum benefits from the government (medicaid) or any hospital. Or, to get insurance. Now, go back to catching flies with honey  You two are in a position where you need people to work with you.

Frankly Dani, I'm somewhat in your position now myself, without insurance. Started this journey with great coverage and got dropped in October. There are others of us on this board who are uninsured. Not a great place to be so I do identify, to a degree, with your postition. If my melanoma ever recurs, it will mean making tough decisions as far as treatment options go.

That, too, my friend, is part of life, not just melanoma. Few of us, if any, will get all our bills paid and get top-of-the -line treatment at the same time. Systems. Life.

Here's a link to MD Anderson's financial assistance page and you can see for yourself their policy, AND you'll see a phone number over to the right. Call, make an appointment with the finance office. Discuss your situation and see if there's any way they'll be able to help Miguel and work with you. Jump through every hoop they may want you to jump through. Be persistent but be good to work with.

http://www.mdanderson.org/patient-and-cancer-information/guide-to-md-anderson/insurance-and-billing/financial-aid.html

If it turns out that they will not accept Miguel as a patient, ask what your best options are regarding other hospitals and doctors. It may well be that you're already getting great care & treatment…regardless of ability to pay. Not all melanoma patients are near specialists or world-reknown facilities and they still get great care.

I really am praying and hoping all works out well for you, Miguel, and your family.

Lord, in Your mercy, You do know their storm and You are greater. Please open the doors for this familiy that need opening, no matter where they are, let Miguel get the treatment he needs and enable Dani to be a powerful advocate on his behalf. Thank You Lord. Amen.

Grace and peace to you Dani,

Carol

Dani,

I hope by now you've seen Miguel's onc and have had some of your questions ansered. I'm sure it's frustrating, but if she's like most oncs, she has a lot of patients to check on, plus, treatments to either oversee or adminster. Like I said, hopefully you've seen her by now.

You do still have a long way to go, just remember you'll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. You need these folks to work with you so be kind. At the same time, you're Miguel's primary advocate so you'll need to be persistent…just don't drive the drs away by being tooooo persisitent. You say you've "continuously asked nurses to page her"…asked every hour or every several minutes? How you treat them will make a difference in how they respond to you.

Now, to tackle what probably no one wants to tackle. I don't either. Dani, we all live under multiple systems and each system has its own set of rules and to get maximum benefits, a person has to go by the rules of each given system.  Federal, state, local governments, hospitals, work places, schools, you get the idea. Even our own homes have rules. Obey the rules and all goes pretty smoothly. Break the rules and there are consequences. We get that until the consequences start applying to ourselves.

To be under 30, in this country, and not have a Social, implies that, somewhere along the way, Miguel, for whatever reason, didn't play by the rules. Hear me, I'm not passing any kind of judgement or making any accusation, and I'm not asking for you to make any kind of explanation as to why he doesn't have a Social, but I am stating the obvious fact and that is that, for whatever reason, he didn't get a Social and he has to have one in order to get maximum benefits from the government (medicaid) or any hospital. Or, to get insurance. Now, go back to catching flies with honey  You two are in a position where you need people to work with you.

Frankly Dani, I'm somewhat in your position now myself, without insurance. Started this journey with great coverage and got dropped in October. There are others of us on this board who are uninsured. Not a great place to be so I do identify, to a degree, with your postition. If my melanoma ever recurs, it will mean making tough decisions as far as treatment options go.

That, too, my friend, is part of life, not just melanoma. Few of us, if any, will get all our bills paid and get top-of-the -line treatment at the same time. Systems. Life.

Here's a link to MD Anderson's financial assistance page and you can see for yourself their policy, AND you'll see a phone number over to the right. Call, make an appointment with the finance office. Discuss your situation and see if there's any way they'll be able to help Miguel and work with you. Jump through every hoop they may want you to jump through. Be persistent but be good to work with.

http://www.mdanderson.org/patient-and-cancer-information/guide-to-md-anderson/insurance-and-billing/financial-aid.html

If it turns out that they will not accept Miguel as a patient, ask what your best options are regarding other hospitals and doctors. It may well be that you're already getting great care & treatment…regardless of ability to pay. Not all melanoma patients are near specialists or world-reknown facilities and they still get great care.

I really am praying and hoping all works out well for you, Miguel, and your family.

Lord, in Your mercy, You do know their storm and You are greater. Please open the doors for this familiy that need opening, no matter where they are, let Miguel get the treatment he needs and enable Dani to be a powerful advocate on his behalf. Thank You Lord. Amen.

Grace and peace to you Dani,

Carol

Just thinking that of he doesn't have a socail in this country, perhaps his birth country has benefit options for his health care he could use in the US. I think if he is here illegally it might be difficult to get a lot of help. I have some friends who can't get much help from social services even.

Just thinking that of he doesn't have a socail in this country, perhaps his birth country has benefit options for his health care he could use in the US. I think if he is here illegally it might be difficult to get a lot of help. I have some friends who can't get much help from social services even.