Hello Everyone,
First time poster. I'm sure of you that are regulars here all see alot of these type of posts. But I'm waiting on my biopsy results and need to vent, and maybe get some assuring words.
A little back story. I'm 39 1/2 years old. Single male. Had a very bad sunburn when I was 19. And about 6 or so years ago, I did visit a tanning booth. (I'm still mad at myself for that).The little extra kicker is that about a year ago, I started taking small doses of Cialis, bc I had "situational ED". Basically performance anxiety. The reason I even went to get checked at the Derm was that I saw an advertisement on TV about Cialis being linked to melanoma.
I had recently had a mole that got inadvertantly scratched off while my back was itching. It blead a little. But scabbed up and felt fine. But that commercial really scared me. So I scheduled my visit, and saw my derm yesterday. He took one look at that mark and said "sebborheic keratosis". I was relieved. But then he and his attending intern did a quick check of the rest of my back. He asked if I had a family history of melanoma. I said no. He asked if I wanted to start it (keep in mind he and I are relatively close, so he wasn't being unprofessional). If anything, that remark gives me hope that it's nothing. He noticed a mole that was brown with a black spot, and the intern said it looked like there were other raised black spots on the border. So they did a biopsy to send it off. I asked what he thought. He replied that the odds were that it was nothing. But he also said there's another spot we need to watch on my lower back. It's brown with a faded border.
Making it even more difficult is the fact that I suffer from occaisaonal outbreaks of facial herpes on one ear, first acquired on my finger, from a gymnasium , that spread to my ear. All the stress over the past week caused a flare up of that, which in turn made my lymph nodes seem sore, but they're not palpable, so it may even be psyco-somatic. But all I can think about is that little dot already reaching my nodes already.
The wait is killing me. My sweet girlfriend (who I'm proposing to next Saturday!), assures me everything will be fine. But I just have this gut feeling… It's like my life has been so perfect, but this is the price I'll have to pay for or it something.
I guess I'm just looking for some assuring words, and/or some empathy.
Thanks bless you all!
Jeff
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