MM, Bears,and a knife fight

Undoubtedly MM had begun to invade my body years ago, while I was still deep in the Colorado wilderness. In that serene environment, the only real natural threat to life was an occasional rogue bear. Yeah, they ate my chickens, turkeys, and any other animal caught off guard near my cabin, but I was after all in their world, and such were the rules. On more than one encounter with them, they put the fear into me, that I could be eaten as well. Over the years I adapted to the threat they posed, and mostly lived in harmony with them. Country rules. Simple, easy to understand.

Undoubtedly MM had begun to invade my body years ago, while I was still deep in the Colorado wilderness. In that serene environment, the only real natural threat to life was an occasional rogue bear. Yeah, they ate my chickens, turkeys, and any other animal caught off guard near my cabin, but I was after all in their world, and such were the rules. On more than one encounter with them, they put the fear into me, that I could be eaten as well. Over the years I adapted to the threat they posed, and mostly lived in harmony with them. Country rules. Simple, easy to understand.

     Fast forward a few years, and I now find myself living on a island with no real natural threats, but  a MM diagnosis, that feeds on me, or off of me, by no rules a country boy can understand. At least when a bear was being aggressive, the rules of engagement were clear. Sometimes it was as simple as just running my ass back into my cabin. Sometimes it was not that simple, but still, rules applied.

 Now I go see a derm. every 12 weeks, and he reminds me that given my many personal traits, and what my body is doing between visits, that I am in a fight. The only way I know I'm in a fight, is this thing called MM produces little black spots on my body, that he takes a small knife to, sends to a lab, then refers me out to another guy with a knife, who cuts bigger and deeper. Oh MM, how I wish you would just come walking down my driveway posing a threat to me. I would have something for you to deal with, and I would tell the story of how I laid waste to your sneaky ass. Thats just my simple country logic fantasizing what I would do. But it does give me some pleasure to imagine such a duel.But no, you sneak around, only show yourself if you please. And relentlessly take beautiful people away from us. If only we could be left alone in a room together for a night. I would go medevil on you, no doubt.

  MM you have changed my conciousness. Besides trying to soak in every second of this life, and be present with the moment, I also have the contradiction to that. Anxiously waiting for the future and what it holds. Like right now, its a beautiful day in paradise, just beautiful. The flowers are exquisite. But, my derm. is out of town for a couple weeks, and wants to re-biopsy a place on my arm, that pathology says, "we need another sample". Beholding the flower, and hoping my derm. hurries his butt back here and finishes the job. Goofy duality.

Bob