stage 1A low risk conflicting diagnoses

I wish there was a stage 1A message board for melanoma as this post is really appropriate for people who have experience with or were diagnosed with low risk melanomas.

I am so respectful of the people who are struggling with a life-threatening disease and this post has so little importance in comparison so I hope I am not being disrespectful by posting on this board.

That said, I have an interesting situation and I'm grappling with how to wrap my head around it. So I'd love any insight or advice.

I was diagnosed in April with stage 1A melanoma. The mole was removed the day after I returned from a week on a boat in the Bahamas. Unfortunately, there was no shade in the Bahamas and I didn't yet realize my risk factors so I was badly sunburned when the mole was removed. In fact, the reason given for removing the mole was that it was red. My back looked tan and I didn't mention how much sun exposure I had gotten to the doctor because I was a bit embarrassed that I had been so careless.

Anyhow, I received a 1A diagnosis which was confirmed by a second pathologist who works with the first.

As I was researching (or over – researching) on the Internet, I came across a number of articles which discussed overdiagnosis, and the possibility of being misdiagnosed when one has mitigating factors such as a sunburned mole. 

Anyhow, I sent my mole off for a third opinion to a Yale pathologist who has closely studied misdiagnosis. I felt very confident that he would give me the same result as the first two, but felt it would make my head rest easier just knowing that I had explored all avenues so I could have a really competent feeling on what exactly my stage and breslow depth was.

I just received my results and he diagnosed my mole as a severely atypical nevus, not melanoma.

He also said that he brought the mole to conference with a group of pathologists and they all unanimously agreed that it was an atypical mole.

I was incredibly fearful after my original diagnosis. I have three kids who need me and I felt so very fearful that I was going to miss something big in their lives: graduations, marriages, everything, because I had been so foolish and hadn't been safe in the sun.  My worry level definitely outweighed my actual risk based on my diagnosis.

If you're still reading, here are my questions. 

My first thought getting the recent diagnosis was one of relief. Should I be relieved?  I now have diagnoses that say both. Who do I believe? Did I have melanoma?

Does this affect my status for future health insurance and life insurance applications? Should I do anything about that one way or the other?

My husband says I should now just be cautious and grateful and I think that is good advice. I have obviously learned lessons about the sun and about being proactive about body scans and I plan to act as though the first diagnosis is correct in terms of getting regular skin checks and being careful in the sun. I had an extensive WLE and I am grateful that I did.

I like thinking that my most recent diagnosis is the actual correct one…  that would definitely help my head…  I'm interested if you all think that I can trust the recent diagnosis or if you think my diagnosis is just uncertain.

Thank you for listening. I'm sorry this is so trivial and I appreciate any thoughts that anyone has.