I can’t find a peace?

This topic has 12 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 9 years ago by looptwelve.

Post

- April 19, 2015 at 7:49 pm
- Quote
Aiden
Participant
Hi everyone!

Here is my story.

I am 35 white male.

In january 2015 I went to visit my new primary doctor. I was wearing simple black tshirt and just like that my primary doctor said, " You do have lots of moles on you, you should see a dermatologist. We white people tend to have skin cancer" Well, that wasn't my purpose of that visit. Ok.

Anyway, after that visit I schedule a visit to the dermalogist.

End of January 2015 I am in the office seeing dermatologist. After quick conversation, she told me to undress for the full body skin check. Ok

She started examining my skin walking around. Suddenly she stopped and said " you do have suspicious mole on your back. I have to do the biopsy of it" I said are you serious? Doctor said yes, you have 50/50 to have skin cancer. I was in shock.

Biopsy done. I am waiting 10 days to find out my final results. Very difficult time for me.

Finally on Friday afternoon my dermatologist called and said. " I have a good and bad news. Bad news is it's Melanoma, Melanoma in Situ found in the mole, good news it's very early. It's just on the surface of the skin, and didn't even break the first layer of the skin"

What now, I asked? She said " I don't want you to worry about it. It's very early and the prognosis are great in your case. You need to have a surgery to be done soon. After that you will be under regular check ups" Ok

Mid of February 2015 I had my surgery done at University of Chicago Hospital. After my surgery I had my final results. All margins are clear. No additional treatment. Continue fallow up with dermatologist.

Eventhough, my case was cought early, I can't find a peace. I think about that everyday, and trying to stay positive. Soon I am going to see my dermatologist for the first check up.

How to live with the thought of being diagnosed with skin cancer?

Thank you all for reading my story

Aiden.

Viewing 5 reply threads

Replies

- - April 19, 2015 at 9:24 pm
  - Quote
  kathycmc
  Participant
  Hi Aiden,
  
  I had melanoma in situ on my back 41 years ago. Treated with wide local excision and skin graft and bi-annual skin checks. I have had many other suspicious moles removed and biopsied over the years without any of them being positive for melanoma. It is important to keep up with checking your skin for any changes and regularly scheduled visits to the dermatologist. You will find, as time goes on, that it gets easier to let go of the fear and just live. Wishing you all the best.
  
  Kate
- - April 19, 2015 at 9:24 pm
  - Quote
  kathycmc
  Participant
  Hi Aiden,
  
  I had melanoma in situ on my back 41 years ago. Treated with wide local excision and skin graft and bi-annual skin checks. I have had many other suspicious moles removed and biopsied over the years without any of them being positive for melanoma. It is important to keep up with checking your skin for any changes and regularly scheduled visits to the dermatologist. You will find, as time goes on, that it gets easier to let go of the fear and just live. Wishing you all the best.
  
  Kate
- - April 19, 2015 at 9:24 pm
  - Quote
  kathycmc
  Participant
  Hi Aiden,
  
  I had melanoma in situ on my back 41 years ago. Treated with wide local excision and skin graft and bi-annual skin checks. I have had many other suspicious moles removed and biopsied over the years without any of them being positive for melanoma. It is important to keep up with checking your skin for any changes and regularly scheduled visits to the dermatologist. You will find, as time goes on, that it gets easier to let go of the fear and just live. Wishing you all the best.
  
  Kate
- - April 20, 2015 at 3:15 am
  - Quote
  looptwelve
  Participant
  I'm in a similar position as you, my friend. My GP found a suspicious mole back in February, and I got it biopsied and it came back as melanoma in situ. It was removed and I was told margins were clear and just do follow up visits every 6 months. I'll probably do every 4 months just because I'm paranoid.
  
  You and I are similar in that we are in our 30's and having a cancer scare. No one wants to hear the word cancer when they're around the prime age of their life. It's scary and it brings mortality to your face when you aren't really ready to deal with it.
  
  I received the news it was melanoma 3 weeks ago, and I still panic about it just about every day. We should both take some solace in the fact that it was caught before it was even invasive, and also that there's only a ~10% chance that you'll even have a melanoma recurrence. If you do have a recurrence, it will likely be as minor as your first. There are alot of scary stories on here and around the internet, and they've fueled my worry over the last couple weeks. I do my best just to tell myself that those cases are pretty rare and that yours and mine are far more common. If there aren't any other hidden melanomas on our bodies, we are ~95-98% (some sources even say 99% or 100%) likely to be alive in 10 years. You really can't ask for better odds than that, especially in any sort of cancer situation. You're probably just as likely to die in a different fashion with those odds.
  
  Just be diligent with watching your moles, report to your dermatologist as often as you are told to, and keep an eye on your lymph nodes just for extra caution. There's nothing else you can do besides that, and to hope you're in the 95-100%.
  
  And tell all your friends and family to keep an eye on their nevi as well!
  
  Andrew
  - April 20, 2015 at 4:44 am
    
    Quote
    Aiden
    Participant
    
    Hey Andrew, thanks for your message. How old are you?
    
    I told my family and close friends about my issue. Let me tell you what they told me
    
    Some family friends didn't really care, some said, I hope your cancer didn't spread already.
    
    One of my close friend said, well I had a friend who had a mole. A year later she was dead.
    
    So Andrew, how can I deal with family and friends now?
    
    they just don't understand.
    
    Thanks, aiden.
  - April 20, 2015 at 5:08 pm
    
    Quote
    looptwelve
    Participant
    
    No problem. I'm 30 years old. I'm sure my melanoma anxiety is also being fueled by a 30-year-old life crisis.
    
    I had basically the opposite experience with friends and family– everyone seemed to know someone who has had a melanoma, and they're all alive, kicking, and well. Most of them just had one occurence and it was gone and forgotten. One is currently in Stage 3, but her melanoma was deep, ulcerated, and her dermatologist ignored it for 3 years until it got to that point. So it seems like it was given plenty of time to get that point and had it been taken care of when it first started to darken and grow, it likely would've been at least a Stage 1 or Stage 2 removal.
    
    As for your friend who ha a friend with a mole and died a year later– you shouldn't panic unless you know the situation. She very well may have not found her melanoma until it was at a dire point. Maybe she didn't find it until it was deep, ulcerated, and had already spread to nodes and organs. Some people don't find their melanoma until it's too late, which is very unlikely in your case. As you'll commonly see around here, every melanoma case is different so try not to apply every case to your own unless it's similar in staging.
    
    Andrew
  - April 20, 2015 at 5:08 pm
    
    Quote
    looptwelve
    Participant
    
    No problem. I'm 30 years old. I'm sure my melanoma anxiety is also being fueled by a 30-year-old life crisis.
    
    I had basically the opposite experience with friends and family– everyone seemed to know someone who has had a melanoma, and they're all alive, kicking, and well. Most of them just had one occurence and it was gone and forgotten. One is currently in Stage 3, but her melanoma was deep, ulcerated, and her dermatologist ignored it for 3 years until it got to that point. So it seems like it was given plenty of time to get that point and had it been taken care of when it first started to darken and grow, it likely would've been at least a Stage 1 or Stage 2 removal.
    
    As for your friend who ha a friend with a mole and died a year later– you shouldn't panic unless you know the situation. She very well may have not found her melanoma until it was at a dire point. Maybe she didn't find it until it was deep, ulcerated, and had already spread to nodes and organs. Some people don't find their melanoma until it's too late, which is very unlikely in your case. As you'll commonly see around here, every melanoma case is different so try not to apply every case to your own unless it's similar in staging.
    
    Andrew
  - April 20, 2015 at 5:08 pm
    
    Quote
    looptwelve
    Participant
    
    No problem. I'm 30 years old. I'm sure my melanoma anxiety is also being fueled by a 30-year-old life crisis.
    
    I had basically the opposite experience with friends and family– everyone seemed to know someone who has had a melanoma, and they're all alive, kicking, and well. Most of them just had one occurence and it was gone and forgotten. One is currently in Stage 3, but her melanoma was deep, ulcerated, and her dermatologist ignored it for 3 years until it got to that point. So it seems like it was given plenty of time to get that point and had it been taken care of when it first started to darken and grow, it likely would've been at least a Stage 1 or Stage 2 removal.
    
    As for your friend who ha a friend with a mole and died a year later– you shouldn't panic unless you know the situation. She very well may have not found her melanoma until it was at a dire point. Maybe she didn't find it until it was deep, ulcerated, and had already spread to nodes and organs. Some people don't find their melanoma until it's too late, which is very unlikely in your case. As you'll commonly see around here, every melanoma case is different so try not to apply every case to your own unless it's similar in staging.
    
    Andrew
  - April 20, 2015 at 4:44 am
    
    Quote
    Aiden
    Participant
    
    Hey Andrew, thanks for your message. How old are you?
    
    I told my family and close friends about my issue. Let me tell you what they told me
    
    Some family friends didn't really care, some said, I hope your cancer didn't spread already.
    
    One of my close friend said, well I had a friend who had a mole. A year later she was dead.
    
    So Andrew, how can I deal with family and friends now?
    
    they just don't understand.
    
    Thanks, aiden.
  - April 20, 2015 at 4:44 am
    
    Quote
    Aiden
    Participant
    
    Hey Andrew, thanks for your message. How old are you?
    
    I told my family and close friends about my issue. Let me tell you what they told me
    
    Some family friends didn't really care, some said, I hope your cancer didn't spread already.
    
    One of my close friend said, well I had a friend who had a mole. A year later she was dead.
    
    So Andrew, how can I deal with family and friends now?
    
    they just don't understand.
    
    Thanks, aiden.
- - April 20, 2015 at 3:15 am
  - Quote
  looptwelve
  Participant
  I'm in a similar position as you, my friend. My GP found a suspicious mole back in February, and I got it biopsied and it came back as melanoma in situ. It was removed and I was told margins were clear and just do follow up visits every 6 months. I'll probably do every 4 months just because I'm paranoid.
  
  You and I are similar in that we are in our 30's and having a cancer scare. No one wants to hear the word cancer when they're around the prime age of their life. It's scary and it brings mortality to your face when you aren't really ready to deal with it.
  
  I received the news it was melanoma 3 weeks ago, and I still panic about it just about every day. We should both take some solace in the fact that it was caught before it was even invasive, and also that there's only a ~10% chance that you'll even have a melanoma recurrence. If you do have a recurrence, it will likely be as minor as your first. There are alot of scary stories on here and around the internet, and they've fueled my worry over the last couple weeks. I do my best just to tell myself that those cases are pretty rare and that yours and mine are far more common. If there aren't any other hidden melanomas on our bodies, we are ~95-98% (some sources even say 99% or 100%) likely to be alive in 10 years. You really can't ask for better odds than that, especially in any sort of cancer situation. You're probably just as likely to die in a different fashion with those odds.
  
  Just be diligent with watching your moles, report to your dermatologist as often as you are told to, and keep an eye on your lymph nodes just for extra caution. There's nothing else you can do besides that, and to hope you're in the 95-100%.
  
  And tell all your friends and family to keep an eye on their nevi as well!
  
  Andrew
- - April 20, 2015 at 3:15 am
  - Quote
  looptwelve
  Participant
  I'm in a similar position as you, my friend. My GP found a suspicious mole back in February, and I got it biopsied and it came back as melanoma in situ. It was removed and I was told margins were clear and just do follow up visits every 6 months. I'll probably do every 4 months just because I'm paranoid.
  
  You and I are similar in that we are in our 30's and having a cancer scare. No one wants to hear the word cancer when they're around the prime age of their life. It's scary and it brings mortality to your face when you aren't really ready to deal with it.
  
  I received the news it was melanoma 3 weeks ago, and I still panic about it just about every day. We should both take some solace in the fact that it was caught before it was even invasive, and also that there's only a ~10% chance that you'll even have a melanoma recurrence. If you do have a recurrence, it will likely be as minor as your first. There are alot of scary stories on here and around the internet, and they've fueled my worry over the last couple weeks. I do my best just to tell myself that those cases are pretty rare and that yours and mine are far more common. If there aren't any other hidden melanomas on our bodies, we are ~95-98% (some sources even say 99% or 100%) likely to be alive in 10 years. You really can't ask for better odds than that, especially in any sort of cancer situation. You're probably just as likely to die in a different fashion with those odds.
  
  Just be diligent with watching your moles, report to your dermatologist as often as you are told to, and keep an eye on your lymph nodes just for extra caution. There's nothing else you can do besides that, and to hope you're in the 95-100%.
  
  And tell all your friends and family to keep an eye on their nevi as well!
  
  Andrew

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