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Grrr…where’s a lawyer when ya need one? (Long as usual!)

Forums Pediatric & AYA Melanoma Community Grrr…where’s a lawyer when ya need one? (Long as usual!)

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      It's BG, and I'm furious!!!!!  Some may remember how I posted about my f**ked up bro and SIL taking my mom's money, etc. etc.   They have not visited her since Sept. nor have they called—-not for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Mother's Day, notta.   She called them almost every day, and they wouldn't answer—except one time, she called at 1am and bro answered, I'm sure thinking it was "the call", if ya know what I mean.  As mom says.. "yeah, they thought I was dead!"

      It's BG, and I'm furious!!!!!  Some may remember how I posted about my f**ked up bro and SIL taking my mom's money, etc. etc.   They have not visited her since Sept. nor have they called—-not for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Mother's Day, notta.   She called them almost every day, and they wouldn't answer—except one time, she called at 1am and bro answered, I'm sure thinking it was "the call", if ya know what I mean.  As mom says.. "yeah, they thought I was dead!"

      She's been here since April and obviously has no plans to leave.  So last week, a cop shows up at my door… to check on the health and safety of mom, because "she's supposed to be in a nursing home in AR".   Um…….no, she isn't supposed to be in a nursing home—-never has.  I hired a nurse to sit with mom at home, and she did for almost a year, except when one of us (me or my 2 sisters) were there.  At $200 a day, it would've been cheaper to put mom in a nursing home, but mom does NOT want to be in one!  I've promised for as long as I can remember, that as long as she has her mind and can help ME help HER (with my back, I can't pick her up—she's gotta be able to step in the tub with help, etc.), then I'd NEVER put her in a nursing home.

      Anyhoo, I invite policeman in to see for himself mom is okay.  She's sitting in living room with her oxygen on. She tells him, "I'm just fine, thank you."  He looks around, sees she's being taken care of, and he's satisfied that she's okay.  Of course, he wouldn't tell us who called, but he didn't have to.. we KNOW.

      So then yesterday, a guy from Dept. of Adult health and protective services knocks on the door.  Says he's here to check on the health and safety of mom (by name).   Oh FFS!!   So I told him to come on in.  Mom's in the kitchen drinking coffee, and she says, WHY do ya'll keep checking on me?  I'm as fine as I'm ever gonna be, and I WANT TO BE HERE (WITH BG).  He tells her he received a call that she was being "held against her will" and he had to come check it out.  HELD AGAINST HER WILL??    hahaha!!  She laughed, and answered all his questions.  (name, birthday, social security number—it's funny, she hasn't been able to remember her social in MONTHS, and she spouted it right out to him!)   He said he had some questions.. did she want me to leave the room.  She told him "Hell no, I want her to stay right where she is."  All the girls are in the kitchen, too, and he asks her questions like, "Are you here of your own free will?"  "Well yeah!"  Do you want to go home?  "NO, if I did, I would BE home!"  Do you have all your medicines? "Yes, I take a shit-load every morning and night–I wish (BG) would stop giving them to me, but she makes me take them anyway, saying they're what the doctor ordered.    And she makes me do a nebulizer a few times a day, and I have to do an inhaler 2 times a day (symbicort), and I have to do an egg-shaped inhaler (spiriva) once a day.  I wish I didn't have to do them, but (BG) makes sure I do them."   So I give him doc's name/number in AR (who knows she is here with me, and has agreed to still be her doc and consult with any docs here).  I give him the doc's name/number she's seen here.   He asked if she lived alone in AR.  She said, no, I paid XXX to stay with me 24 hours a day.  I told him XXX and I had grown up together, starting in the church nursery, and she was an LPN, and loved my mom and wanted to take care of her.  (She lost her mom to cancer at a young age, and has always considered my mom as HER 2nd mom.)   He asked her again if she wanted to be here.  She said "Didn't I just tell you already I did???"

      I'm laughing my @$$ off by this time.  So HE laughs and says he's headed to close the case.  I told him to come back anytime he felt like it—-that we KNEW it was bro and SIL who had called, and how they'd manipulated her out of tens of thousands of dollars, and were pissed because their gravy train was cut off–no more $$$.  He said he wouldn't need to come back unless he had problems "closing the case".  He asked for a copy of my Power of Atty, so I had to print that off the 'puter for him.  He asked her if I manipulated her into making me POA.  She tells him, "NO, damnit.  I haven't lost ALL my mind yet—I want (BG) to be my POA."   I explained to him that the attorney who wrote up the POA had to see her in his office to determine if she was of sound mind to make that decision, and that he was obviously satisfied she WAS, or he wouldn't have changed it from my brother to me.  He wants to know if I've taken any money from her—mom says "well if she HAS, it's okay with me!".    I tell him he can look at her checkbook if he wants—I've written checks for medicine, personal needs (like hair dye… lol), cat food and litter (we switch because I have a cat too—so one time we'll buy the food and litter, and the next time, she will buy),  and her beloved sausage, biscuits and SYRUP.  (She goes thru a HUGE bottle of syrup about every 5 days.  She'll eat 2 pieces of sausage and one biscuit in the morning, and put a cup of syrup on it!  LOL!!)  She likes her sweets!!  (Yes, I've got all the receipts for everything mom's paid for.)  He says he's heard all he needs, and he'll be closing the case.

      So my question is….. how the hell can I STOP the harrassment from bro and SIL?  This is BS.  I've talked to attys about suing them to get mom's money back (they've advised we should wait until AFTER mom's gone?  Dunno why, but I think they don't want to stress her out with a court hearing or trial)); I've talked to the police: local, county and state, who are researching what they've done, and I've got the AR Dept of Human Services, Adult Protective Division, looking into them.  Yeah.. I wanna prosecute to the fullest extent. My NEXT call will be to the IRS if they don't leave me and mom alone.  (I'll probably call IRS anyway—maybe THEY'LL do something!)   But seriously, how can I get them to back off?  Hubby is pissed—it takes a lot to make him mad, but this has done it.   It's obvious bro/SIL are desperate and trying to find any way they can to get to me and get to mom's money.  Guessing they know they'll NEVER see mom (alive) again, as long as she's here, 'cause they will NEVER be welcomed in my home again, EVER!   (That's not just from me, but Hubby has said they'll never step foot in our home again, or he has something for them.. haha!)   But—they weren't visiting or calling her anyway!  I haven't harrassed them..I don't talk to them at ALL, but I HAVE tried to pursue restitution and/or prosecution.  What gives them the right to come after me, when I'm not the one that stole from, and manipulated mom?  They're guilty, they KNOW they're guilty, they can't prove WHY they took the money, tho they say they CAN.   Excuse me, but if someone was accusing ME of taking tons of money, I'd be busting my @$$ to prove them wrong!

      Sorry, just venting, but if anyone knows how I can stop them from sending people over to check on mom, it'd be appreciated.  I love my mom dearly, and would never harm her, or take her money.  I'm trying to 'grow" back some of the money THEY took—-since she's been here, I've had her phone put on hold, cancelled her cable, etc.  She still has water, gas, electricity—for my sister and son and XXX who check her house regularly.  The neighbors are also keeping an eye on the place.  Her mail has been on hold, but XXX is going to change it to here.   Bro/SIL are really po'd that I've had XXX and sis send ALL their mail back, saying "not at this address; return to sender".  Apparently, they again changed their addy to mom's, and again, we've still had the mail returned to sender.  It's not like they've been there to pick it up anyway!!   And I'm a little concerned if they're using her addy, then that can establish residency on their part.  There is a Life Estate on mom's home/land, giving it to the 3 girls.  THAT pissed bro off.  Changing POA pissed him off.  He's REALLY gonna be pissed when he finds out she changed her will, leaving him the tractor and piano, and the rest to us girls.  All us girls have pianos, and mom's will cost more to fix than buy a new one, but he's always wanted it.  So…. he'll get it!  lol!  The John Deere tractor (not top-o'-the line, but not cheap) is getting old now, and it ain't gonna be worth much, either.  But.. he'll get it!  I hope he has fun mowing around his EIGHT full-sized, climate controlled storage rooms of furniture!  LOL!!   They're paying enough in storage, they COULD own a house, but I never said they were the smartest cookies in the bag.

      I think I'm just tired… Hubby put the girls on his insurance, so since last week,  I set the girls up with a pediatric doc (taken 3 different trips for physicals); taken mom to doc and ER for tests; had my PET and saw my onc.  Now I've got to take mom to a cardiologist (tomorrow), a gastro (Friday), nephrologist, and urinologist; gotta set up appts for the girls (pediatric cardiologist for Lacy; orthopedic for Allyssa, and a derm and dentist for all of them).   I feel like all I do is go see docs!!  Cannot WAIT for vacation next month!!!

      Nobody need reply—like I said, just venting.  But if you DO reply (like if you're an atty with advice, or have gone thru this and what you did), please please please don't use my real name, as it can be googled by bro/sil and they can see everything I wrote.    Not that I really give 2 shits, but I don't particularly care for them knowing they have gotten on my last nerve by sending the cops and protective services by.  I wish the state of TX would nail them for wasting their time on BS. Hmm.. maybe they will!  =)  

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